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Old 05-08-2007, 06:08 PM   #21
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Nothing you can do to reassure them much, my friend. It's just the way things are...if they're the worrying type, they will. If they are more relaxed, they will be relaxed. I know my Mom worries. I just try to make it over there a day or so before I leave, talk to her, give her a hug before I leave, and tell her I'll stay in touch. The proliferation of internet cafes has helped reassure them. Just stay in touch as much as you can...

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Old 05-09-2007, 06:44 AM   #22
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My parents are alright with my travels. I still tell them I'll keep in touch and call with phone cards though.
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Old 05-09-2007, 11:03 AM   #23
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Thanks for your thoughts and reassurance, tpunks :D

I think my plan for getting my parents on board for this trip was in 2 steps.

Step One was to throw at them everythign I had read about safety in Syria and Turkey, so convince them that it wasn't as unsafe as their gut reaction tells them. I think I managed to do this.

Step Two was to convince them that I would be okay on my own, since I will be with others, and the places I'm going are well travelled. I sent my parents a 4 page email yesterday to convince them... they have not replied yet.

I'm going home to Toronto from Ottawa this weekend... should be an interesting one... :D
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Vincent: "So what you gonna do?"
Jules: "Well, basically, I'm just gonna walk the earth."
Vincent: "What you mean 'walk the earth'?"
Jules: "You know, like Kane in 'Kung Fu'...go places...meet people...get in adventures."

Trips (only counting recreational travel):
FIRST TRIP (2005): FIRST EUROTRIP EVER! UK, France, Spain, Italy, Germany, Holland
SECOND TRIP (2007): First Solo Trip! Greece, Turkey, Syria, Spain
2008: China (Beijing, Shanghai, Yangshuo) ...right before the Olympics!
2009: Japan & HK, Southern Spain
[size=1]2010: All over Lebanon, Ibiza (Spain), Oktoberfest (Germany), Thailand.
2011: India (Goa), Jordan, Jerusalem, San Sebastian (Spain), Amsterdam (again), London, Driving from Vancouver to L.A. (stopping in Portland, Seattle, San Fran and all the little stops), Montpellier (France), Geneva and Lausanne (Switzerland)

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Old 05-13-2007, 11:19 AM   #24
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yeah it was cool but well shit as well becuase everyone there was a suit!! and i got sneered at a lot for not being a suit myself. and turning up there blind drunk at 4am wasnt too nice either :S then they wouldnt let me into the breakfast place cos i didnt look smart enough. wasnt good!! my dad knows now not to do that, he just gives me money and tells me to keep some of it away from the rest in case i get in trouble and need an emergency. but both parents dont really ask questions - my dad was bought up in south africa and his idea of danger is not the sort of places i travel.

i dont have to reassure any one but myself, but i think just talking through it, being prepared and informed is the best you can do.
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Old 05-13-2007, 11:42 PM   #25
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I'm actually amazed at how cool my parents are about me traveling, especially solo...my mom seems a bit worried but she mainly just wants to make sure I keep in touch to let them know I'm ok while I'm gone. So I try to send an email at least every time I get to an internet cafe.

The reason I'm so impressed by how well they handle this is that a girl my age who I grew up with 2 doors down was carjacked and murdered along with a friend in Costa Rica a few years ago. Which is supposed to be one of the "safe" countries in south america. So I could understand them being completely freaked out, I'm pretty lucky that they're able to stay grounded despite all of that.

I'm lucky to be male...I think there are a lot places and a lot of people that view women are just viewed as less of a person
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Old 05-14-2007, 06:51 AM   #26
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Just got back from Toronto over the weekend...

You know, I was expect a weekend of drawn out fighting over whether I should go on the trip, but actually my parents turned out to be pretty cool. I think they realise that I have made up my mind, and now are just focused on making sure I will be safe.

I think my Dad was more pissed about how I brought up the trip, than me actually going... cuz basically I booked the entire trip, THEN said "oh yeah, by the way, I'll be going to the Middle East this summer"... I guess its true, parents do deserve more than an FYI.
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Vincent: "So what you gonna do?"
Jules: "Well, basically, I'm just gonna walk the earth."
Vincent: "What you mean 'walk the earth'?"
Jules: "You know, like Kane in 'Kung Fu'...go places...meet people...get in adventures."

Trips (only counting recreational travel):
FIRST TRIP (2005): FIRST EUROTRIP EVER! UK, France, Spain, Italy, Germany, Holland
SECOND TRIP (2007): First Solo Trip! Greece, Turkey, Syria, Spain
2008: China (Beijing, Shanghai, Yangshuo) ...right before the Olympics!
2009: Japan & HK, Southern Spain
[size=1]2010: All over Lebanon, Ibiza (Spain), Oktoberfest (Germany), Thailand.
2011: India (Goa), Jordan, Jerusalem, San Sebastian (Spain), Amsterdam (again), London, Driving from Vancouver to L.A. (stopping in Portland, Seattle, San Fran and all the little stops), Montpellier (France), Geneva and Lausanne (Switzerland)

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Old 05-14-2007, 11:46 AM   #27
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I do the same thing, J. But I am very wish-washy. I say "hey I found this great deal to so and so, but I probably won't do it." I think my mom already knows that I am going to do it if I bring it up to her every day when we're talking on the phone, whether or not I say I'm going to do it.

I'm glad they're cool with it though!!
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Old 05-14-2007, 01:00 PM   #28
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Sounds like it is a big weight off your shoulders...Glad it went well for you.
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Old 05-15-2007, 02:09 PM   #29
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hurr111 View Post
Sounds like it is a big weight off your shoulders...Glad it went well for you.
Thanks bud...

The ironic thing is that undoubtely the most dangerous thing I will do at the trip is San Fermin.. in 'safe' ol western europe.

Now on to actually planning how I am going to get around in Turkey and Syria...
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Vincent: "So what you gonna do?"
Jules: "Well, basically, I'm just gonna walk the earth."
Vincent: "What you mean 'walk the earth'?"
Jules: "You know, like Kane in 'Kung Fu'...go places...meet people...get in adventures."

Trips (only counting recreational travel):
FIRST TRIP (2005): FIRST EUROTRIP EVER! UK, France, Spain, Italy, Germany, Holland
SECOND TRIP (2007): First Solo Trip! Greece, Turkey, Syria, Spain
2008: China (Beijing, Shanghai, Yangshuo) ...right before the Olympics!
2009: Japan & HK, Southern Spain
[size=1]2010: All over Lebanon, Ibiza (Spain), Oktoberfest (Germany), Thailand.
2011: India (Goa), Jordan, Jerusalem, San Sebastian (Spain), Amsterdam (again), London, Driving from Vancouver to L.A. (stopping in Portland, Seattle, San Fran and all the little stops), Montpellier (France), Geneva and Lausanne (Switzerland)

"Bite off more than you can chew, then chew it."
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Old 07-08-2007, 07:39 AM   #30
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I suffer from the same thing. I think having travelling companions or even meeting up with people helps the reassurance. I think the worse is if they've had a bad experience there themselves. Can't wait to tell mum of my maybe trip in Italy come year-end, where one of her friends almost got robbed. Hah, but then again, no where is safe.
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Old 07-08-2007, 07:32 PM   #31
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I guess we all kind of face the same issues eh? In truth, my parents are pretty supportive of my travel and don't mind too much if (and here's the key point) I have someone to travel with. Unfortunately most of the world doesn't really get travel the way we do, and it's hard to find someone to do a two-week trip with you, much less a two-month or more. I try to meet up with friends along the route and have prior contacts when I can, and that helps them be somewhat less nervous.

On other fronts, I've kind of started them up slow and moved on from there, getting them used to each level of craziness - starting with a 2-week trip with detailed itinerary, to a month-long trip with a sort-of itinerary, and now on to a 2 month trip with no itinerary.

They still panic though, although they normally calm down after a bit, and I try to be in touch as much as possible, and tell them what's realistic and what's not for contact and making safe contacts. I don't know, I think parents just can't help worrying about their kids, although mine don't flat-out forbid me to do stuff anymore. I completely understand their nervousness about me going out into the world as a solo young girl, and I think I've done all I can do - prove that I'm a level'headed, practical and street-smart traveler, and that shit can happen anywhere in the world regardless of how "safe" an area is.
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Old 07-13-2007, 03:35 PM   #32
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I'm leaving for my first real trip in September, and while my Dad is THRILLED (since he got remarried he and my step-mom have been travelling fools), my Mama is less than excited about the situation... She is the anti-traveller... She just has very little to no desire to travel anywhere (She went to Delaware last year and THAT was a bit much for her)... So for her, grasping the concept that I wanted to leave my home town (let alone the continent) is next to impossible... But I've reassured her that I will leave her an itinerary, call home once a week on a specific day to keep her updated on my location, and e-mail when I can... Now this certainly didn't solve the problem completely (she still doesn't WANT me to go...), but it does help her to manage the worrying...
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Old 07-13-2007, 06:44 PM   #33
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ok, so I see I am not alone in the world of parents. Hey CB, I feel the same at this point as the first post.....
My Dad literally had a heartattack the first time I moved away and it was only the state below.... 3 hours away.
That is what I fear. Causing pain on his already fragile heart.
I am also scared my grandmother (has alzheimers) will pass. She was always like a mother to me..... I admire her most of anyone in my life. I'm sure if she was in her right mind, she would be fearful, but supportive of my life now.


Someone said it to me in a post... and as simple as it may sound.
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Old 07-14-2007, 02:49 AM   #34
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Hey Roxy, yeah I was actually worried about grandparents passing (knock on wood) while I was away, or that my mom would worry herself to sickness...but none of that happened, thankfully. I hope your dad will do okay about your trip...

Right now i am writing at Gatwick airport at the end of my trip and you know what... my parents survived my trip.

Of course, I had to email home everyday otherwise my mom would call the hostel (which happened in Turkey which was the most embarassing thing ever)...but I think it worked out just fine!
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Vincent: "So what you gonna do?"
Jules: "Well, basically, I'm just gonna walk the earth."
Vincent: "What you mean 'walk the earth'?"
Jules: "You know, like Kane in 'Kung Fu'...go places...meet people...get in adventures."

Trips (only counting recreational travel):
FIRST TRIP (2005): FIRST EUROTRIP EVER! UK, France, Spain, Italy, Germany, Holland
SECOND TRIP (2007): First Solo Trip! Greece, Turkey, Syria, Spain
2008: China (Beijing, Shanghai, Yangshuo) ...right before the Olympics!
2009: Japan & HK, Southern Spain
[size=1]2010: All over Lebanon, Ibiza (Spain), Oktoberfest (Germany), Thailand.
2011: India (Goa), Jordan, Jerusalem, San Sebastian (Spain), Amsterdam (again), London, Driving from Vancouver to L.A. (stopping in Portland, Seattle, San Fran and all the little stops), Montpellier (France), Geneva and Lausanne (Switzerland)

"Bite off more than you can chew, then chew it."
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Old 07-14-2007, 08:42 AM   #35
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Canadian Bacon View Post
Of course, I had to email home everyday otherwise my mom would call the hostel (which happened in Turkey which was the most embarassing thing ever)...but I think it worked out just fine!
Haha, the same thing happened to me in Japan. When I landed it was way to late to call home (3am local time). So I just updated the ol' blog and went to bed. When I woke up at the crack of dawn the next day in the lobby of the hostel was a big note saying "Joey call your parents".

What can I say they worry.

Where did you start the San Fermin run? I have to think the folks were a bit nervous about that

--Joey
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Old 07-26-2007, 01:17 PM   #36
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Quote:
Originally Posted by joe7f View Post
Where did you start the San Fermin run? I have to think the folks were a bit nervous about that

--Joey

Oh, I never told them I ran... and I never told them my crazy "running through Istanbul" story either.

My conclusion: the only way to reassure worried parents is to DO THE TRIP! (and then hide all the dangerous details)
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Vincent: "So what you gonna do?"
Jules: "Well, basically, I'm just gonna walk the earth."
Vincent: "What you mean 'walk the earth'?"
Jules: "You know, like Kane in 'Kung Fu'...go places...meet people...get in adventures."

Trips (only counting recreational travel):
FIRST TRIP (2005): FIRST EUROTRIP EVER! UK, France, Spain, Italy, Germany, Holland
SECOND TRIP (2007): First Solo Trip! Greece, Turkey, Syria, Spain
2008: China (Beijing, Shanghai, Yangshuo) ...right before the Olympics!
2009: Japan & HK, Southern Spain
[size=1]2010: All over Lebanon, Ibiza (Spain), Oktoberfest (Germany), Thailand.
2011: India (Goa), Jordan, Jerusalem, San Sebastian (Spain), Amsterdam (again), London, Driving from Vancouver to L.A. (stopping in Portland, Seattle, San Fran and all the little stops), Montpellier (France), Geneva and Lausanne (Switzerland)

"Bite off more than you can chew, then chew it."
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Old 07-26-2007, 01:20 PM   #37
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Oh right, sorry didn't answer your question. I ran the 2nd half... and honestly I didnt' thinnk it was that dangerous.

But after I walked back up the street and saw the blood on the walls...
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Vincent: "So what you gonna do?"
Jules: "Well, basically, I'm just gonna walk the earth."
Vincent: "What you mean 'walk the earth'?"
Jules: "You know, like Kane in 'Kung Fu'...go places...meet people...get in adventures."

Trips (only counting recreational travel):
FIRST TRIP (2005): FIRST EUROTRIP EVER! UK, France, Spain, Italy, Germany, Holland
SECOND TRIP (2007): First Solo Trip! Greece, Turkey, Syria, Spain
2008: China (Beijing, Shanghai, Yangshuo) ...right before the Olympics!
2009: Japan & HK, Southern Spain
[size=1]2010: All over Lebanon, Ibiza (Spain), Oktoberfest (Germany), Thailand.
2011: India (Goa), Jordan, Jerusalem, San Sebastian (Spain), Amsterdam (again), London, Driving from Vancouver to L.A. (stopping in Portland, Seattle, San Fran and all the little stops), Montpellier (France), Geneva and Lausanne (Switzerland)

"Bite off more than you can chew, then chew it."
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Old 07-26-2007, 08:59 PM   #38
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yuck..... I bet there was blood everywhere. You are a brave one CB!!!!!!
My mom is getting used to the idea. The potential boyfriends for her I keep "interviewing" (making them take me to dinner to find out if they are right for her) are scoring a lot of points with me, and helping to let my mom know she should embrace my lifestyle. All that is left is my dad..... I'll keep everyone posted on the details......... Fun Stuff!!!!! Be careful out in the crazy world CB! Don't make me call your mother.... tee hee hee~
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Old 07-27-2007, 04:31 PM   #39
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ha, my parents are the super-religious type so they are more concerned with me drinking and humping my way into the arms of Satan while im traveling rather than getting mugged or whatever

but its the same thing, you approach and reassure your parents that you are mature about the risks (of either physical harm and robbery or strange poonani ), and then when you come back you edit the stories and pictures a bit. at some point you just have to accept that your parents may not approve and then go out and live your own life.
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Old 07-29-2007, 08:42 AM   #40
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^dude I was banking on you saying that. Christian or Mormon?

Anyway yeah my folks are the same way. They are more worried about my drinking habits then anything else.
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