Next time engage her in conversation, mentally beat her to a pulp with your superior wit and knowledge. Then, when finished, say:
"Dam, y'all, I tought them New Yorker's were s'posed to be smart somptin feirce! Guess you caint beleive ery'thin ya hear these days. Aw well, we can't ALL be smart, let's go get us a coon."
*lived in 3 southern states, and is therefor allowed to make fun*
Last place of US residence, Missouri. "Fly-over land" to those on either coast. When they can't keep up mentally with one of these backwoods types, it makes them feel about 3 inches tall. Or 1, if I'm feeling particularly vicious.
I'm really a nice guy, but speak down to me at your peril
Cheers.
(yes, I'm really leaving for Paris now, my ride will be here in 30 minutes... time for one more post!)