should i stay... - TravelPUNK Backpacker College Student Budget Travel Message Boards!



Go Back   TravelPUNK Backpacker College Student Budget Travel Message Boards! > Backpacker College Student Travel Message Boards > Polls

Polls Which country has the most...
Curious on the mindset of the TPunk community? Start a poll!

View Poll Results: Should i stay or should i go
stay 0 0%
go 5 62.50%
wait and see 1 12.50%
oh i hate decisions 2 25.00%
Voters: 8. You may not vote on this poll

Raileurope.com: See Europe by train
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 05-24-2006, 08:47 AM   #1
 
xtremefx's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Loch Carron,Highlands,Scotland
Posts: 432
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Send a message via ICQ to xtremefx Send a message via AIM to xtremefx Send a message via MSN to xtremefx Send a message via Yahoo to xtremefx Send a message via Skype™ to xtremefx
Default

ooo'k so life is a nightmare,and dreams are trapped and slowly dissapearing in this small vortex of hell,all thanks to my parents,well mainly thanks to my parents XD

so come 15th June if i havent given money to my parents i am gettin kicked out of teh house,i have to give em money as a rent kind of thing,and considerin i dont have the best job (little hours,crappy pay),i dont get much money,and what money i do get i am trying to save for stuff that i can get so i can buy things i need fer travellin at end of year,now my life is really really bollocks at home,andlife is baaaaaaaaaaaaaaad,basically i dont kno how much money to give them,i will have 300 say come the date,and i was thinkin about givin em 200 or 250 and hopin that will keep there mouths shut,but i feel it wont,and things will get worse and worse,until there maybe only 2/3 options left,as i was at home for a few minutes earlier on,jus gatherin some stuff before i had to go back to work,my dad and i started havin a row,and i was home less than 5 min,and then after i got some stuff sorted out,i was back off to work,cos i couldnt stand the atmosphere,im not sure what else to say,if you want something more detailed then msg me and ill talk to ya,if not then a comment on how stupid i am and how awesomely correct my parents are will do,i say this because not much of a story has been put down here and parents are older and wiser kinda thing.

so should i save what little money i have,and come june 15th just go somewhere,like london and try and get something done down there,and somethign sorted or should i stay and give them money,and keep living in a bottomless pit of nothing and failure which comes from me parents,today,at lunch is the only real time when i thought about sayin fuck it and going,ive thought about going before,many many MANY times before,but at lunch today i really thought

what ya think i should do


hmmm,i expect quoting and responses that i wont like

cheers,Ryan
__________________
link soon to be added...


...


_
xtremefx is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-24-2006, 08:55 AM   #2
TPunk Emeritus
 
worldwidemike's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Columbus, Ohio USA
Posts: 3,405
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default

Here's what I'd do:

Look around and see how much renting a place would be in your area. Then, ask them how much they want in monthly rent from you, and compare it to that amount. If they're asking anywhere near the "going rate," tell them it's too much. Tell them if they ask for too much money, you'll never save up enough money to leave, and that they'll be stuck with you. And if they try to say that you should contribute as much as a stranger renting the room from them, that they'd end up paying for a LOT more expenses to rent to the public (getting the place to conform to local standards, etc). They should charge you less since you're their son!

Good luck...
worldwidemike
__________________
Check out my travel web page at:
Worldwidemike.com
"Life is not measured in the number of breaths we take, but by the places that take our breath away..."
worldwidemike is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-24-2006, 08:58 AM   #3
Members
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Near London
Posts: 265
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Send a message via MSN to JeanB
Default

Ryan fuck it, and fuck them.....I feel the same way about where i am at the moment too. Lets do the right thing and get our arses somewhere else where we won't feel eternally guilty for existing.

Dont let em grind you down........its a big wide world and there are loads of places we can live, other than the shittish isles.

Obviously you need a plan, so have you considered tefl? or bar work in london? theres loads of shitty jobs everywhere, not just where you live. keep that money and use it wisely. spend it on getting the hell out of dodge.

And above all else......good luck geezer.......
__________________
Last night i had a dream about reality. It was such a relief to wake up. - Stanislaw Lec.
JeanB is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-24-2006, 10:03 AM   #4
lover of Germany
 
expatben's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Ontario,Canada
Posts: 2,670
Thanks: 3
Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts
Default

Geeze thats terrible! If I were you I would move out. Maybe get a place in the area so you can keep your job. Would any of your friends/family put you up for a while?
TEFL is a good way to get out of the UK I myself have dabbled in it. Infact, you can even do a TEFL outside the UK. If you want more info on TEFL or if theres anything I can help you with feel free to message me.
Sorry dude
Ben
__________________
I have been to: Canada, USA, Iceland, Britain, France, the Netherlands, Belgium, Spain, Poland, Germany, Sardinia, Switzerland, China, Argentina, Brazil, Chile, Uruguay and Morocco.

Do to list: [color=blue][color=black] Australia, New Zealand, Austria India and Bolivia.

[color=blue][i][font=Verdana][color=black]"I'm just another stranger lookin' for the promised land"
expatben is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-24-2006, 10:46 AM   #5
Tpunk Senior Moderators
 
lauren313's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Birmingham, England
Posts: 2,266
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default

Well, I think it's perfectly reasonable for your parents to charge you rent. When I get home from uni, I'm getting charged 25 a week by my parents, which obviously is waaaay less than the going rate at the minute.

You actually need to talk to your parents about this, not just assume they want a certain amount of money - if you don't ask, you'll never know. Maybe you can ask them what they think is suitable for weekly rent, and then actually come up with a plan on when you're going to start paying, how much, and when the money is due each week/month. That way there won't ever be any confusion.

Obviously you're not particularly happy living with your parents, but the other thing to remember is... if you can't afford to give your parents money, you won't be able to afford to live all on your own in London. Of course, you'll try to get a better job, but London is a pricey place to live.

Good luck.
__________________
lauren313 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-24-2006, 10:47 AM   #6
Ohio State's #1 Fan
 
Brookers13's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Phoenix, AZ!
Posts: 1,099
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Send a message via AIM to Brookers13 Send a message via MSN to Brookers13
Default

well i know for sure that theres no way i could live at home again...but ive been away for 3 years now. But, here's what I think. If you could barely scrape that amount to pay them, I don't see how you're going to be able to pay for your own place and bills...shitty but true. So I say work something out with them like pay them 250 and have them put 50 aside each time for your "moving out fund". Then you keep saving on your own too and when the time comes, you have a lil savings account started to help you out...just my opinion, take from that what you will
__________________
"If we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane"-my idol Jimmy Buffett


"I wanna be there, I wanna go back down and get high by the sea there, with a tin cup for a chalice, fill it up with good red wine, and ill be chewin' on a honeysuckle vine...." - Jimmy
Brookers13 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-24-2006, 10:53 AM   #7
To Smart For Mensa
 
TheJake's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Salt Lake City
Posts: 5,818
Thanks: 3
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Send a message via AIM to TheJake Send a message via MSN to TheJake Send a message via Yahoo to TheJake Send a message via Skype™ to TheJake
Default

I am 21 and in a similar situation though my parents haven't started charging me rent yet, thank god. I used to fight with them a shitload and then I just stopped caring and stopped fighting. For now I have to be here to get my debt paid off, sure i could move and still pay stuff off but my other expenses would make it much harder. However if my parents tried to charge me to live there you can bet your boots i'd be gone within the week. They tried to do it to me once when they thought I was blowing all my money on booze and going out but then I proved them wrong by staying home for a month and not answering my phone.

Basically it's been the longest year and a couple months of my life but i have gotten one and a half credit cards paid off so only another one and a half to go. And i didnt even try to pay them off until a couple months ago so I know with some certainty that i will be out of here by january.

My advice to you is to look at a site like www.coolworks.com (i know there is a site just like this for uk kids but i can't remember what it is) and find a gig like www.ymcarockies.org where they house ya feed ya, and pay ya.

Hell the Ymca of the Rockies would probably even sponsor you to get a visa but you'd have to buy your plane ticket.

Best of luck mate!
__________________
Adventure needs to be as much about discovering yourself as it is about discovering the world.
TheJake is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-24-2006, 12:07 PM   #8
TPunk Emeritus
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Indefinite.
Posts: 2,874
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Send a message via AIM to bluepea
Default

I think you've gotten some great advice. I think if you're only 18/19, it's kind of cruel for parents to charge rent. You're still getting adjusted to the adult world - why make it harder? But, if you're older, sometimes parents need to give that push to get their house back.

I would definitely talk to them as see what they want. Explain that you'd like to save, but perhaps take on more chores around the house. Otherwise, consider your other options.
__________________
~~ Jamie ~~
You give me the most gorgeous sleep That I've ever had And when it's really bad I guess it's not that bad




Have some general questions such as whether or not to get a rail pass or how much money you'll need? Visit here!

First time travelers/travelers with a lot of questions - this forum is for you![b]
bluepea is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-24-2006, 12:13 PM   #9
T-PUNK VICE ADMIRAL
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Atlanta, GA USA
Posts: 1,315
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Send a message via AIM to foofiter Send a message via MSN to foofiter Send a message via Yahoo to foofiter Send a message via Skype™ to foofiter
Default

You already know my opinion from chatting and getting support here from these people.

They are right about the money thing...but you can go on the Dole again if you have to until you find work wherever you end up man. If you want something bad enough you will get it. Plain and simple.

Lets not forget--you WORK IN A HOSTEL. You can live there and save money. I am sure the boss can give you a break on the rates and such. So you should see what kind of deal he will give you, ask the parents how much they want, and go with the cheaper one. Then all you have to worry about is food.

So get off your ASS and take action!!

Foo

__________________
"To Alcohol! The cause of--and solution to--all life's problems." -- Homer J. Simpson
"I didn't get to where I am today worrying about how I am going to feel in the morning." -- Ron White (Blue Collar Comedy Tour)
"I was born to lose and destined to fail." -- Mike Ness, Social Distortion
"Eat healthy, exercise daily, die anyway" -- My motto
"Everyone I know, goes away, in the end...I will let you down, I will make you hurt..." -- Johnny Cash (NIN Cover of "Hurt")

I am traveling around the world until I find something that makes me want to stop. I am an aspiring photographer and hope to find whatever it is I am looking for...
foofiter is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-24-2006, 03:18 PM   #10
 
Echeverry's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: NYC/FL/Ven
Posts: 585
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Send a message via MSN to Echeverry Send a message via Yahoo to Echeverry Send a message via Skype™ to Echeverry
Default

I have the solution! let's all become hippies and live in reykjavik! nah honestly, listen if they are planning on charging you ask them for time so you can get all your stuff straight (Keyword: Finally) and that you really want to see what you can find outside your house but that they can please give you like 2 months( Which you will turn into 3 months) and be out of the house in a more stable situation. or you can simply get out of the house and make a friend tell them that you got robbed in middle of the street and that they took all your money and savings and now you are living as a homeless under a bridge! They'll go for the rescue!
__________________
Tell me where you're @ and I shall tell you where 2 dance Emmanuel. E. Echeverry/DJ_VeeeNoM.
Echeverry is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-24-2006, 03:33 PM   #11
TPunk Emeritus
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Indefinite.
Posts: 2,874
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Send a message via AIM to bluepea
Default

Quote:
I have the solution! let's all become hippies and live in reykjavik! nah honestly
Thank god you were kidding. Have you ever been there in March??? No wonder Iceland has such a high suicide rate!
__________________
~~ Jamie ~~
You give me the most gorgeous sleep That I've ever had And when it's really bad I guess it's not that bad




Have some general questions such as whether or not to get a rail pass or how much money you'll need? Visit here!

First time travelers/travelers with a lot of questions - this forum is for you![b]
bluepea is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-24-2006, 10:35 PM   #12
TPunk Emeritus
 
Somnambulation's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: California
Posts: 1,698
Thanks: 0
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Default

Sounds like its time to go Menendez on they asses.
Somnambulation is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-25-2006, 03:57 AM   #13
TPunk Recognized
 
MeTurk's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Ireland
Posts: 1,590
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Send a message via Skype™ to MeTurk
Default

I feel like I'm having a Dr Phil moment.. They are your parents for Gods sake go and give em a big hug, their proably just sick to their hind teeth of the site of you.

Seriously though they are entitled to get rent off you and their probably asking more to teach you the value of money and give you some aprechiation of paying your way in the world.

Stop fighting and have a chat I'd say if your up front with them and say your plan is to leave but you just need time to save some money first, they'll understand and help you.

I remember getting all thick when my mother asked me to pay rent but in retrospect I feel like a right selfish prick for not giving her rent. It's just to easy to take your parents for granted.
__________________
"It's nice to have a nun around. Gives the place a bit of glamour." Fr Ted
Couchsurfer (:_irritainment_
MeTurk is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-25-2006, 04:01 AM   #14
Tpunk Senior Moderators
 
lauren313's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Birmingham, England
Posts: 2,266
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Default

^ ^ ^

Well said Dr Phil (I love that man!). I completely agree, once people turn 18, they're no longer the "responsibility" of their parents, and at some stage after that, I think rent is a good idea. I know for a fact that my parents have better things to spend their money on than food and electricity and water for me... which is why they ask rent.

Parents get to a stage where they have to start setting you up for adult life, and as rent is something you'll face in the real world, it's pretty good practice if you ask me!
__________________
lauren313 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-25-2006, 04:12 AM   #15
 
xtremefx's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Loch Carron,Highlands,Scotland
Posts: 432
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Send a message via ICQ to xtremefx Send a message via AIM to xtremefx Send a message via MSN to xtremefx Send a message via Yahoo to xtremefx Send a message via Skype™ to xtremefx
Default

im not complainin about not having rent or anything,i mean before,like last year when we lived in a crummy flat,i was paying em 140 a month and that was for phone bill(long story-ish) and rent,70 for rent and 70 for phone bill,and i would rather not pay rent,who wouldnt but i have no quams about doing it,but with what small amount of money i get,its kinda hard,and i dont spend my money on anything except food,i only buy food and drink incase i have to stay at the hostel for a night or 2,i dont drink or smoke,and i dont go to town to see my friends,(one bus to/fro everyday and costs 11.80 for a return,75 miles away),when im not workin,im at home,ok,FACT - i could get another job,but with the fact of my current job,this job,the hostel job,it makes things so much more confusing with the possible end up no days off,no rest,and more stress,and high stress levels and teenage life as a whole,thats not good

i complain alot,hmmm...
__________________
link soon to be added...


...


_
xtremefx is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-25-2006, 07:06 AM   #16
lover of Germany
 
expatben's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Ontario,Canada
Posts: 2,670
Thanks: 3
Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts
Default

Try talking with them and come up with some arrangment. I pay my folks 100 per month which covers food, electricity phone ect. We just agreed on it and moved on, its a lot simpler we all know where we stand and stuff. So yeah, just flat out ask your folks how much they want, then, tell them how much you have and work things from there. If you come to an agrement great and if not than think about going somewhere else.
I feel bad for ya though and I hope it works out
__________________
I have been to: Canada, USA, Iceland, Britain, France, the Netherlands, Belgium, Spain, Poland, Germany, Sardinia, Switzerland, China, Argentina, Brazil, Chile, Uruguay and Morocco.

Do to list: [color=blue][color=black] Australia, New Zealand, Austria India and Bolivia.

[color=blue][i][font=Verdana][color=black]"I'm just another stranger lookin' for the promised land"
expatben is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-25-2006, 07:44 AM   #17
TPunk Moderator
 
Elizabeth's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: USA
Posts: 1,401
Thanks: 0
Thanked 3 Times in 2 Posts
Default

Sorry to hear things aren't going so great. I feel for you. I'm only 17 and my mom is already trying to get me to pay half the cable bill and part of the rent. I'd be giving her my whole paycheck

Why would you want to go back to London? I remember you said London didn't work out for you (the reason you said is escaping me now lol).

Just throwing out this thought right here - If you can't get enough work/pay in your town and you're not paying any or very little to your parents, its going to take you a long time to save up than in a place with a lot of work. If you can't get enough work/pay in your town and you have to pay rent to your parents (possibly a large percentage of your pay?), then you will probably never have enough money saved. Its like a no win situation.

I don't know what the job market is like in the UK but could you go to a city with more work, but less expensive than London? If you're going to have to pay full rent to someone, it might be better for it to be in a place where you can make more money.

But I'm really bad at descision making, which is why I chose the 4th option
Elizabeth is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-25-2006, 08:01 AM   #18
 
xtremefx's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Loch Carron,Highlands,Scotland
Posts: 432
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Send a message via ICQ to xtremefx Send a message via AIM to xtremefx Send a message via MSN to xtremefx Send a message via Yahoo to xtremefx Send a message via Skype™ to xtremefx
Default

there is no reasonin,because i didnt have a job for about6 months or sumit,i really cant rem how long atm,and i had been spunging of em fer so long,i think they want money to cover those back months,

i left london because i...can't remember
__________________
link soon to be added...


...


_
xtremefx is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply






Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Don't stay here!!! KaseyCaye Western Europe Hostels Bad Review 17 10-07-2006 11:21 AM
should i stay or should i go now? Tripping Daisy Love/Relationships 13 04-12-2006 05:31 AM
Should I stay or should I go? pinion Love/Relationships 13 09-20-2005 02:15 PM
Where should I stay? cspotp Europe: Eastern 0 04-12-2005 09:26 AM
Where should I stay? Mari5 Hostel, Hotels, Budget Accomodations: Questions and tips 8 11-10-2004 12:12 PM


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:31 PM.



 

Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.2.0

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121