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Old 05-09-2007, 03:35 PM   #41
TheJake
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I think the whole friend aspect is the biggest part of it for me. I am getting ready to move 12,000 miles away in a week and my friends and family here are making it rough. They all think I am coming back in six months or a year but I have every intention of trying to never have to come back, at least to Phoenix, for more than a short visit anyway.

How do you convey this to people? I am finding it's just easier to let them believe what ever they want to and knowing that they will have moved on in their lives soon after you're gone. The pain eases and whatnot. Where as a traveler it seems like that part of my head/heart is gone. I feel very little connection to almost anyone at all. I can love you like a brother one minute and move right on to the next city the next minute without a second thought. Is anyone else like this?
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Old 05-09-2007, 06:55 PM   #42
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I'm right there with you bro. As my wife and I are about 11 months away from leaving with no intention of coming back. As for myself, I have the same thoughts as you. I can be cool as shit with someone and have a blast etc... but i can also wake up the next morning and hit the road without looking back. Like i love my family and stuff, but I have already moved away 3 times so far, and some how ended up right back where I started. Its taken me 7 years to prove to my wife that she would enjoy life on the road, and now she gets it and is ready to go today. Although she is more attached to her family, and is sad about leaving, thats not getting in her way at all. Like most of us, she has grown to love life on the road and the lack of the 9-5 living mentality is so appealing. Life without schedules of anysort and a relatively constant change is so invigorating.
So basically, my wife and i have the exact same feelings and emotions in dealing with people that can't really grasp what we are doing. Luckily, we have the passion and desire to not let others opinions get in our way. Once you hit the road, all those emotions fade, and you are right Jake, peoples lives move on once you are gone!
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Old 05-09-2007, 09:36 PM   #43
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For the past couple of weeks, I too have been pondering over this issue but for me, it's slightly different in the regards of me being more distant, or different is due not only to just traveling. While I love traveling as much as the next TP, I always have lived my life different from what people my age do, or will. The things I want, my mindset, point in life always seem to be a little further than what is usually presented at my age (23) so I end up chasing things that are slightly out of my reach.

As a result, I really have a hard time finding people that understand my desires and wishes. I have a couple of good friends I can always rely on no matter how different or far we grow apart but next to them, I really don't find my other acquaintances really 'friends'. Don't get me wrong, I have absolutely no problem getting along with strangers in fact thats probably one aspect of traveling I enjoy most.

I'm turning 23 in June and the first time the question of how I want to live the rest of my life is starting to set in, or in another words, I'm finally worried. Worried not because I'm afraid I won't be able to support myself or my future family but rather, like some of you, do I want to live a 9-5 life? I work in IT literally from 9-5 and have been doing so for the past oh 6 years and I'm not afraid to admit, I'm quite good at this occupation and make a decent living being only 23 and all, especially if you consider the fact that I haven't even got that piece of paper people my age should be completing by now.

It's funny, one of the things I want most is to be able to find someone that understands why I love to travel and love to travel herself. I don't know about the rest of you, more often than not when I see something nice when wandering around, the first thought usually is, oh I wish N____ was here. Ha. Can you believe I actually found someone that is almost perfect for me and yet loves to travel? The reason this question ever came up is because of her. One day she told me that her best friend is leaving Vancouver for a job right after graduation and all her friends are so concerned about walking into the real world after Uni. My first thought wasn't what they should do but rather, how different I am compared to them and they're only a few months younger. But it's just that I've chosen to live my life differently. Ironically this special person is too, having this same problem.

Due to distance and a few other variables, we're not together but oh, I'll wait patiently for her. Ultimately the reason I wrote this is because she made me realize that life has more to it than this, I won't accept the fact that I will be doing this till I die. So the question I have been pondering over is, do I want to continuing working 5 days 9-5, buy a house, have more debt than I know what to do with or take off for a RTW trip I always wanted to before I really have too much debt? Only thing I have to worry about now is my car payments and rent.

Damnit I love Vancouver, it's my home but I always wanted to live in Japan for a while. I love the culture being Asian and all.

On a side note, I love Jake's signature: "There is an art to being alive and it doesn't involve a nine to five.", oh and one more thing, I hate working IT. I hate it hate it hate it.. Gosh I sure ramble on and mostly not even related to this topic at hand. Funny, these questions are always in my mind and I think about it a whole lot. I have yet however, to talk to any of my friends or family about it because I don't think they would understand. This here, is the first time I even mentioned it to anybody heh..

Bleh, that felt good haha
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Old 05-09-2007, 10:27 PM   #44
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We are here for ya man! Let it out!


And damn it all! Sell the car, forget the rent and goto japan!
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Old 05-10-2007, 04:00 PM   #45
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Yeah, I know what it's like to be different from everyone around you....while I AM working on getting that "piece of paper" as you put it, my dreams are VERY different from anyone else I've ever met. Basically, this is because my dream job doesn't chase down wealth, and it doesn't involve work in Canada/US. What I really want to do is work in a developing country such as South Africa or Sri Lanka and work in the conservation wildlife field. No money there, but there's also no 9-5 job~I'd get to be active/working outside and do something that I love. Most people think I'm absolutely loco to want a job that will pretty much pay me NOTHING but there it is, my dream.

I say follow you're heart. Go for the RTW trip before you get sucked into the north american mentality and feel like you have no way out.
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Old 05-10-2007, 09:39 PM   #46
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Originally Posted by simply_angelic View Post
I say follow you're heart. Go for the RTW trip before you get sucked into the north american mentality and feel like you have no way out.
Now thats what I'm talking about
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Old 05-11-2007, 08:13 AM   #47
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Originally Posted by TheJake View Post
I feel very little connection to almost anyone at all. I can love you like a brother one minute and move right on to the next city the next minute without a second thought. Is anyone else like this?
ok, that is totally me. I think of myself as being 'emotionally detached'. that's why i have been able to jsut move away from my country for , hey, over a year now, away from everyone, and not really care. but i have been kind of lonely lately. well, i was with a couple of australians in brasov, romania and we moved on to sighisoara together which was nice and fun after a 4 month no aussie contact stint. although i came to cluj-napoca today instead of joing them all on the way to budapest.
but actually i have realised that i find it hard to relate to people from my country now. i am used to being a novelty and getting to explain everything ("a pavlova.. it's an aussie cake... like a giant meringue. we just steal things from other countries and make them HUGE") and dammit i love it. it's kind of awesomely great being around people from other countries all the time. i think i will freak out being back in aus... .. ah well it will be funny and cool too.. whenever that it..
but yeah, i think that's another part of the travel effect... how you then relate to people from your own country, from the same background... the people who should identify with you...
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Old 05-11-2007, 12:22 PM   #48
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I just took a big step on Wednesday and gave my notice to work. I am giving them a month to help them find someone to replace me. It is so easy to get sucked into that daily grind and feel like there is no way out. It happened to me!

I am very much like you Jewps...I never got that "Peice of Paper" and went right into the work force...I entered the retail management world of 52.5 hour work weeks and no weekends...But I was good at it and made a lot of money so it was tough to break away.

It is a scary decision to leave everything behind to travel, especially friends and family, but I think ultimately leaving them for long periods of time makes you appreciate how much they mean to you in the long run.
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Old 05-16-2007, 08:24 AM   #49
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For all those out there worried about "getting married, having kids, settling down and giving up traveling", all those things don't fall like dominos. We've done the first two, but after 13 years, still haven't done the last two...can't see it ever happening.

I'm pretty philosophical about the friendship thing - I figure the good ones can survive whatever span of distance and time, and the ones that don't have already served their role in your life. We meet so many people in our nomadic life, and really enjoy those friendships for as long as they last - be it a few weeks or months, or umpteen years. Treasure them when you have 'em, and let go gracefully when the time comes, no regrets. The good ones can handle anything.

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Old 05-16-2007, 10:18 AM   #50
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it excites me that one day i am going to pack up and leave. how long for, who knows? where to, i dont care. my attitude is this: next year i will finish uni with around £23,ooo debt. thats A LOT of cash. nearly double my mums yearly wage. this does not bother me at all. debt means nothing to me, money means nothing to me. money is just a way to keep your head up. ive been really really skint, and loved it, and had money and been miserable (like now) ive travelled to asia 6 times now, and im more than used to leaving my mum and freinds in the UK behind.

my main thing is that i dont know what i want to do with my life. where do i want to work? i dont know. but i do know that london is not inspiring me. so what have i got to loose? im going to finish my degree, work in a shitty supermarket for a few years then up and leave. i dont have a masterplan except to follow my heart, follow inspiration and 'find' out more about myself, my dreams and aspirations, and how (and where) these dreams are best realised.

its hard to be motivated and inspired in this concrete jungle they call london, unless of course you aspire to work in the city on a 9-5. i have never wanted this...id rather sign on then sell my soul to the london underground!

many of my family come from different countries, and reside in different countries. ive grown up with having a few family members on different continenents. my dad has lived in south africa, the UK, and malaysia. he has travelled the world many many times, and although its for work, that is what he loves and good for him. im sure my mum would travel the world also if money was no issue. so i guess i am used to saying goodbye to people for long periods of time, used to moving about, comfortable with change.

wow long thread! but my advice to people thinking about it - do it. dont let debt, or rent, or car insurance hold you down. those are the sort of things youll face again when you find a long term home, even if it is in japan, or london, or brazil. if you do find during your trip your not cut out for long term or permenant travel, you can always go home. pick up the peices, and learn from the experience.

dont let anything in this material world hold you down, emails and phones are worldwide, so you can always contact your loved ones. it gets easier as it goes along!
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Old 05-17-2007, 09:11 PM   #51
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Damnit I love Vancouver, it's my home but I always wanted to live in Japan for a while. I love the culture being Asian and all.
Speaking as someone who just came back from Japan I would say Dewa Mata and have a blast. Get a job teaching English, or don't work and just backpack. If you have always wanted to do something, especially if that "something" is something that requires you to be young, just do it. Bite the bullet, take the plunge, dive in head first etc. It is sure hard to climb Fuji when you are retired.

--Joey
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